Christmas has been and gone and all the things I was going to share with you over this time have just been shoved to the back of my mind and there they will probably stay. Pain was the winner in all the things that jostled to take prime position in what really is my favourite seasonal event. Ironically whilst wrapping presents, the last 3 presents of one of my girl's stockings to be precise, I leaned over just a little too much and ouch. It hurt. Not too much but enough for me to need the 'help of Jesus' to finish those 3 tiny little presents. Ha ha - not the last time I called out to Him for help either. My advice to myself to work through the pain was disastrous advice and Christmas day and many days after saw me in a ridiculous amount of back pain. So much so that I missed church (my favourite service of all the year), cared little for opening my presents or indeed eating my beloved Christmas dinner, fortunately prepared by my even more beloved older sister. I lay on the floor, listening to conversations from everyone else in all the other rooms in the house. I couldn't laugh, although they all did. Often at me. I didn't mind. I looked ridiculous bent over double, shuffling along as though I were the great grandparent in our throng and then there were the moments of total humiliation: half in and half out of bed, stuck until the painkillers kicked in; being taken to the toilet where I had to stand not sit, and needing someone to help with the adjustment of clothes if you get my drift; spitting toothpaste gunk all over myself as I couldn't bend over the sink; the list is endless and so was the pain. Would it ever go? Would I ever be normal again? Questions which, in the dark of night, with pain as my companion and only the promise of painkillers in the morning, brought me to the point of claustrophobia in my own body. I just wanted to move and move quickly please.
Of course a week later and I'm sitting up at my computer, there's still pain but I can move. I won't be running a marathon anytime soon or even the 5K that my pre new year resolve had decided on but life is beginning to feel a little bit more as it should. The last laugh is on my family as they continue to have to do the 'chores' that my back just doesn't allow me. I'm thankful that I'm European and therefore there is no rush to pack away the Christmas decorations - I have until 12th day for that pleasure.
Meanwhile I do have the pleasure of revisiting my wonderful gifts that I really didn't give justice to over Christmas and ponder on the love of my family and friends for which I am ever thankful. But more than anything I think on the precious gift of health and how it allows us to function in this world of ours. My heart aches for those who carry pain with them all the time with little or no release from it and it makes me long just a little bit more for the place where " ..... God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away."
Till such a time I have 'stuff' to do, routine, ordinary, typical 'stuff' but here's hoping too for the extraordinary, the special and the unique. If for no other reason than it would make blogging a whole lot easier.
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